What Is Really Important?

When it comes to life and our lives, what is really important? Sometimes in the midst of day to day living, it's easy to forget what really matters and what does not. For example, we have a society that is a host to rules and regulations, policies and procedures and it's easy to get overwhelmed and confused. Many of you that know me personally, know that one of my favourite sayings is “Garbage day is Thursday”. Yep, that's what I say. What do I mean by that? Well, the real, underlining idea behind that is that MY garbage day is Thursday and yours is Wednesday or whatever day it is, AND that the point is somebody made it all up! Life and our world is just that, a bunch of made up stuff and someone or somebodies of people made up some protocols, systems, beliefs, rules, and we follow along like Sheeple.... (sheep/people). We start focusing on the dots of life rather than the big blank background of possibilities. We argue over trivial things like fences, what to have for dinner and who did what right or wrong. We get our egos involved and we try to control and regulate and follow procedures and be right and not wrong and etc. etc. and on and on it goes. How much fun is that? Sounds exhausting to me. So, when I say to myself “Garbage day is Thursday, it immediately reminds me to be centered and grounded in what really matters. At the end of the day or even at the end of our lives, I believe that what really matters is a quote from Life Coach Cheryl Richardson, “What matters is who you loved and who loved you”. That's it. It can't get any simpler than that. So the next time you find yourself arguing with the neighbour about a fence, or correcting your child incessantly, or majoring on the minor, or focusing on the dot, remember “Garbage day is Thursday”... it's all made up anyway and it is only love that truly matters. xoxoxo

Love is Neutral

A friend of mine, Maureen, shared this thought with me recently and I thought, “how wonderful”. Before I begin, though, I want to clarify that I am not talking about neighbours as in, I have a problem with the fence, noise etc. I am referring to neighbours in life in general. So on the note of love being neutral.....
Yes, love is love and just is. If we could truly practise this we would have no judgement, we would indeed, be neutral. For example, my neighbour in life does this, that, lives their life like this or that, etc. and I think it’s right, wrong or whatever I happen to judge it as. If we are loving and in “neutral” we would not judge it as anything, just love it for what it is. We would be neutral. We would have no need to judge it, we would just observe it. How freeing this is. It is our judgements that hold us and bind us to pain and suffering and egoism. Without judgement, our neighbours, family members, friends and everyone in our world would be free to express themselves and we would not have to attach to it at all. We would be free to express ourselves and live in alignment with our higher selves and our own expressions of how we want to live our lives. It reminds me of my favourite philosophy about love “I want what you want”. To me that is truly loving someone; not loving them for what I think I need or want from them or how they affect me and my life. I love and support them in what they want for their highest and greatest desire.... to me this is the freedom of love. This is being neutral.

Cry Not

While walking home today after dropping Sivanna off at her daycare, I started to reflect on the realization that this is the last week she will be attending there before starting school. The daycare has had a special place in my heart and this is an end of an era for both Sivanna and for me. I thought I would share how interesting this experience was for me. As I started to feel the associated emotions of the transition; such as sadness, loss, change etc., I then became an observer of myself. I realized that “feeling these feelings” was truly a choice. Wow, I realized I did not have to be sad. I could choose to experience this or not. It was very freeing to realize that Sivanna is starting school next week whether I am sad, happy or indifferent so why would I want to feel loss and suffering? I chose to not attach at all and just enjoy the walk home with promise of a new era in our lives beautifully unfolding as it will.... ahhh.

Driven

After watching the movie “Eat, Pray, Love”, I was once again reminded about how driven we are here in the Western World. When we observe other countries and cultures, it is beautiful to see how they can embrace “just being” much more naturally than we seem to do. We seem to be so driven. Driven for what? To be, do, have? To get to someplace where we can just be? It seems we are so driven we forget to get off at the bus stop called “Just Being”. We get on a bus called “Driven” and hope to end up at “Just Being” but somehow we miss the stop. Perhaps other cultures make the bus stop the priority and not the bus. Hmm, food for thought.... and on that note, I was once again reminded of the simple pleasures of food. The simple pleasures of sharing food and enjoying both the food and the interaction; nourishing both the body and soul. Could it really be this simple? Could we really just find peace in being? In being alone, together, just being? I say yes. It’s time to put the bus stop first and not the bus. 

The Sweet Loss of Motherhood

As each day passes and I take Sivanna to day care, I feel more and more strongly a sense of loss, sweet loss. This is her last year going to daycare prior to starting school and I know it's the end of an era so to speak. For me, it signifies the end of my baby. Her babyhood. That sweet time for a mother when all is well; a mix of the new excitement of having a new life in your world and the thrill of motherhood. The biggest sensation I have is losing this net of safety and control that this age seems to provide. Perhaps motherhood is meant to be this way so it can ease us into the changes and experiences life offers it's participants; a gradual integration. The daycare seems so safe and serene. Not only the daycare will I miss, but weekday mornings spent at Ballet or Kindergym. These places also feel safe and let me escape from the rigours of the adult world. They are moments in time that see to stand still. I love chatting with the other parents, grandparents and caretakers of the children. I love seeing the joy of the children expressing their newly found selves, moment by moment. At these events I get to be both a child again and proud new parent... so sweet are both of these. I am open to change and love the new experiences life has to offer but my mother's heart knows she will miss these moments more than I can say.... ah the bittersweet joy of motherhood.

The Genie in the Bottle

The Genie in the Bottle

Your wish is my command,
The Genie in the bottle is who I am.
You cannot see me, but I am always there,
Everything you wish for, I can hear.
Some call me God, Some call me Allah.
The name you call me, does not matter.
You are all born equal with me as your guide.
In good times and bad, I am always by your side.
I do not judge you, I do not care,
I give what you ask for and I am always there.
You ask with your thought, your word and your action.
The wish is more powerful if you ask with passion.
I have no need. I am here to serve,
Whatever you get, you deserve.

By: Don Perry
January 2010

Perception, Once Again

Perception Once Again


While walking Sivanna to Daycare the other day, I was once again reminded about perception and its many guises and how quickly it can manifest. We were walking along the fence that adjoins the playground and Sivanna said “Look Mom someone left their sweater, it must be a teacher’s”. I looked over, saw a navy blue sweater draped over a log, and agreed with her. “Yes, honey somebody did and you are right it must be a teachers”, I said, judging by the size. We proceeded into the school where the children were gathered and I mentioned the sweater to the teachers. They agreed that this was possible as it was hot and cold and they had been adjusting their clothing to accommodate the weather. I left the building and started on my walk home. While passing “the sweater” I realized it was not a sweater at all, it was a navy blue towel! Both Sivanna and I had seen a navy blue sweater that would fit the teachers. What a great example of perception and building beliefs. Not only did we both believe there was a sweater but we added more thoughts to it which became beliefs i.e. who’s sweater is was. Perception is like that. We take something and use perception to make a whole new creation by adding thoughts and judgements. The point of power however; is truly in knowing it is our creation. Perception is a filter, a tool, to use to perceive and decipher and relate back to us a form of clarity or understanding. We need to tread lightly with perception and to beware of its many guises and its easy ability to mold itself into beliefs. Perception and judgement can often be found hand in hand and the tool (a verb) of perception now becomes a noun, “Judgement”. Judgement reminds me of vines. The kind of vines that wrap themselves around whatever they can, the kind that gets into the tiniest nooks and crannies, the kind that become steadfast and sturdy and almost impossible to loosen. Awareness is the first step to loosening our judgements and questioning our perceptions. When we do this, we are more free to observe and see the world in it’s perfect divine order and are better able to discern “what is" and to experience the freedom of non-judgement and move to unconditional love.